I’m sick. Boo hoo. My lymph nodes are swelled up like balloons and it feels like my throat is filled with jagged edged rocks. So here’s a quick quiz. Would it be the best time for a) laying back with some chicken soup, b) staying in bed with broth, jello and a good book, or c) writing a blog post I’m not at all in the mood to write?
If you guessed (a) or (b), then congratulations… You don’t have the balls it takes to succeed. Not yet. Sure it’s an ‘ok’ time to do those two, but ‘ok ‘ never wins MVP. It’s these times you really have an opportunity to step up, to prove your “worth” against seriously obstacles, and that’s the only “worth” that means crap.
You follow your goals when things are normal, then good for you, you’re average. You do that when times are tough, you can slog it out and excel during those times, go the extra mile, then you have elevated yourself from the “do it when it’s easy” crowd into the “success beyond expectations” crowd.
‘Easy’ won’t truly test you. ‘Hard’ might burn you out after a while. If times are hard, and you take them as hard, you might exhaust yourself. The trick is, whether easy or hard, there is an element of choice. Let me make this even clearer for you, you have a choice as to how to take things. Sometimes that choice is 100% of how you feel, sometimes it’s only 5%, but either way the choice is there, and the more you realize it, focus on it, use it, the more of a choice you have.
There’s this brick wall that’s preventing you from reaching a mindset of Manhood. The wall of “external factors.” Your girl left you, you’re sick, you’re busy, you’re stupid, it’s a tough week, lots of deadlines, you’ll do it later, whatever… This wall, your excuses, your refusal to take responsibility, your failure to choose how to take things, is the reason you don’t feel like a Man in any particular moment. You’re walking down the hallway blaming your state on something other than you, obsessing about some condition in your life that has “held you back” from being a Man.
But you’ve never realize that the wall isn’t impenetrable. As a matter of fact it’s more like a door, a really heavy solid stone door. And it is, very slightly, ajar. There’s a crack running down the entire length where it meets the wall. That’s the crack created by your ability to choose your attitude at any given moment. THAT’s your point of leverage. Again, emphasizing this point:
You have the ability to choose your mindset at any given point in time.
When you decide to exercise that choice, it’s like shoving a crowbar in that crack and leaning on it. But if you focus on other factors, external factors, it’s like throwing your shoulder against the door and trying to close it. The crack will shrink to being almost imperceptible.
The point of this article is to clue you in to the fact that this huge stone door is ajar, and all it needs is the choice and some effort to get it moving, opening, to you let you walk through into the hallway of Manhood, of “real” Men (hint: there’s no other kind of “Man,” with a capital “M,” other than a REAL one, so “real Man” is redundant, but I’ll use it for other reasons).
That’s the powerful commitment I referred to in an earlier article. That’s the choice-element that you need to access. The simple choice to feel positive, not negative, good, not bad, like a Man, not like a wuss.
Let me prove to you that you can access this powerful choice extremely easily. First, sit down. Second, identify whether you’re feeling more like a Man or more like a whiny boy. Take a few moments to truly feel who you feel you are inside, and whether it’s more like a boy, or more like a Man. Third… You’re already done, you just have to realize it. Because to even make that distinction, you had to realize what it means to be a Man. To realize that, to test whether you felt like a Man, you had to have awareness of what it means to be a Man, recreate the feeling and test it against how you felt.
It’s waiting inside. You know it is. Now the next time you remember what it feels like to be a real Man, don’t do it as a test, do it just to feel the feeling. Hold it inside, and keep on doing whatever you do. At any moment in your life, you have the power to recall a feeling, not as a remote memory, but as a present experience. To remember a feeling you must recreate it. There’s no other way. If you can’t completely recreate the feeling, you can’t completely remember it. So if you can even remember Manhood enough to judge that you’re not feeling it right now, you’ve already recognized, even for a split second, that you have a Man, inside you, fighting to get out. Just let it…
Just Be a Man.